Sonya: So I’ve been keeping the experience of that ‘ah ha!’ moment at the front of my mind. The seeing that everything is happening on its own accord without ‘me’ actually deciding anything has been pretty relevant for me lately. I mostly find myself loosening the ‘reigns of control’ when I’m driving and noticing how easy everything is and how much more fun I am having when I let go a bit more. It’s realising experientially, bit by bit that it’s actually better in every way to step back. I notice that it’s when ‘I’ pop up and start planning/ scheming is when the light/ fun flavour of the world around me dulls. It’s like I’m seeing the world through different lenses depending on how much ‘in control’ ‘I’ am. (link)
Hi Sonya,
This is a great discovery and one which stands you in good stead every time you remember “to step back”. Being more and more naïve makes life not only easier but so much more fun!
Sonya: Just in time to walk down the aisle this weekend haha.
Congratulations to both of you – you both have the tools, the commitment and dedication to live together in peace and harmony.
Sonya (to Kuba): I do notice that I have also found it harder to hold on to being serious. There have been a few fleeting moments when ‘I’ have felt I needed to be serious and be upset about something and one look at you grinning at me in playfulness and it all just dissipates. What a waste it would be to be serious and upset when I could enjoy this moment with you.
Hehe, it’s such fun to have a happy playmate and you already noticed and reported that you can have this non-serious enjoyment with other people as well. (link) It is indeed contagious.
The only time we seem to argue is usually when I’m on my period but notably a couple weeks ago when I had my period you didn’t notice at all which is a big YAY! Now to keep it consistent. (link)
You might like this section from Richard’s journal, which I found while looking for something else, revelling in the delights of peaceful and harmonious companionship –
Richard: From where I am sitting I can see into the carpets, bedding, pillows and curtains, it looks snug and inviting. Light, seeping from the curtained portholes, casts a cosy glow around the hulls, reflecting this exquisite home as it sits safely upon the inky-black water. I am indeed having a wonderful time … and it is a well-earned wonderful time, too. Nothing has come without application – apart from some serendipitous discoveries because of pure intent – and my companion and I am reaping the rewards.
The dividends resulting from taking the risk are plentiful and deliciously satisfying. The abandonment of the mystique freed me up to a world of actual splendour, based firmly upon sensual and sexual delight. The actual and unabashed enjoyment of our bodies and the world around us is such a luscious and immediate experience, that the tantalising but ever elusive promise of the mystique is slowly fading into the oblivion it deserves. Somewhere, shrouded in the Mists Of Time, humans were deprived of their birthright; their exquisite sensual and sexual joy was usurped by the mystique. With its unfulfillable covenant – its promise of an ineffable, never to-be-explained, unfathomable core of Mystical Bliss – mystique had become the successful repressor of human being’s genuine sexuality and sensuality.
This easily explicates just why, throughout the ages and the cultures, both men and women have been repressing a woman’s sexuality. In the western societies the more obvious ‘reasons’ for repression are no longer valid: every woman is well-educated in genetics, is basically able to live independently of a man’s financial support, has easy access to contraception and, with the advent of modern medical discoveries, has no need to succumb to the “old wives’ tales”. This made me question why the repression continues. This made me ask why, in most orthodox sexual information, the emphasis is still only on menstrual cycles, sexually transmitted diseases, pregnancy procedures and a clinical description of the genitalia. Why is it that mothers – and fathers too, for that matter – do not talk about the excitement of the sight and touch of an aroused penis? Or the titillating feeling of erect nipples? The crawling, tingling, tickling sensation in the lower belly? The warmth of the vulva which opens to the moist and full coloured lips? Why are parents not revelling in talking about the glorious sensations when touching, stroking, licking, rubbing, pressing … the acutely responsive clitoris … the readily excitable penis … the increasingly juicy tension building up … unabashedly wallowing in the sensual and sexual world of purely sensate physical delight.
The answer was both clear and simple: people would rather be Sacred than actual. (Richard’s Journal, Article Two)
Enjoy, and then some more.
Cheers Vineeto