Hi @Henry,
Henry: I realized that all I am really doing when I’m playing these games is finding out what works and what doesn’t, there’s no need for any emotional involvement / involvement from ‘me.’ […]
By doing all that I’ve developed a wonderful library of knowledge of what works and doesn’t, which I can carry forward and share with others. And I can continue every day – trying this, trying that.
There was something I was doing as an identity, ‘identifying’ with particular outcomes – “I am a winner / I am a loser,” not aware that both of those are completely dependent on conditions – all there is to do is tweak a condition here and there and the whole thing can flip. There is winning and there is losing but neither are permanent states – just as nothing in this universe is permanent. It’s wonderfully dynamic, and quite fascinating to take part in.
Now that you have discovered your, the identity’s, propensity to be a winner/loser and discovered experientially that you don’t have to do that anymore, you could apply this to your whole life and live your life on a preference basis. Viz:
Richard: I did everything possible that ‘I’ could do to blatantly imitate the actual in that ‘I’ endeavoured to be happy and harmless for as much as is humanly possible. This was achieved by putting everything on a ‘it doesn’t really matter’ basis. That is, ‘I’ would prefer people, things and events to be a particular way, but if it did not turn out like that … it did not really matter for it was only a preference. ‘I’ chose to no longer give other people – or the weather – the power to make ‘me’ angry … or even irritated … or even peeved. (List B, 12a)
Richard: I did everything I could to be as happy and harmless (as free of sorrow and malice) for as much as is humanly possible. This was achieved by first putting everything on a does-not-really-matter-in-the-long-run basis. That is, I would prefer people, things and events to be a particular way, but, if it did not turn out like that, it did not really matter for it was only a preference. I chose to no longer give other people – or the weather even – the power to have me annoyed, irritated, irked, or even peeved(*), if this was possible.
Then, as it was patently obvious in those experiences of pristine purity how this very moment of being alive is the only moment of ever actually being alive, I began to treat each moment again as precious. After all, it is not as if we have an unlimited amount of moments and – unlike a bank account which can be replenished – our supply of such moments is our most valuable (albeit dwindling) asset. In practical terms this meant being aware of how each precious moment was being experienced; if feeling good (felicity and innocuity) was the prevailing experience then this attentiveness ensured enjoyment and appreciation, of the sheer fact of being alive, each moment again; if feeling bad (unhappy and harmful) was the prevailing experience then whatever had displaced feeling good became readily apparent, upon such attention, with so much at stake. (Richard re Out-from-Control, (*)check out the tooltip after “peeved” in the original).
In other words, if you put everything in your life on a preference basis then you can be winner big time, not only in a rather insignificant game on your mobile phone (I mean in the grand scheme of life) but in every moment of your life. It can look like this –
Richard: I do have personal preferences … one of which is a marked disinclination to engage in any sport or sporting activity (including all aspects of spectatorism).
There is, for instance, a preference for omnivorism over vegetarianism; a preference for water-based activities (boating, swimming, and so on) over land-based activities (hiking, mountaineering, and so forth); a preference for comedic entertainment over the dramatic/ a documentary over a fantasy/ the voluptuous over the horrific … and, to detail a few general ones at random, a preference for creature comforts over frugal asceticism, a preference for the warmer climes over the colder, and a preference for civilisation over savagery.
Please bear in mind, however, that a preference for something is to merely prefer this over that … and if ‘this’ is not available/ does not happen then ‘that’ does not detract one iota from the utter enjoyment and sheer appreciation of being just here, at this place in infinite space, right now, at this moment in eternal time, as this particular form which perdurable matter (mass/ energy) has taken shape as. (List AF, No. 118)
Doesn’t this course of action intrigue you?
Cheers Vineeto