Andrew: Cheers Vineeto!
It really amazing that you picked up on my use of the word irony! I hadn’t spotted that indeed there was a “wryly amusing” aspect to it. I am pleased that I used the word, and it had that meaning, in that it was accurate to an extent for sure. There was also a general gladness that I had found it funny too, but it is accurate that there was a slightly cynical and self-reproach in the humour.
The next day, which was yesterday, I had a very heavy time dealing with beauty, specifically I saw an old image of me, and waves of hatred and disgust swept over me. The coincidence of the previous days “nostalgia” attack wasn’t lost on me, as these two, “nostalgia” and “hating my looks” have been bubbling away unexamined for a very long while.
This is because I was not putting in the effort to make the method (the Actualism method, with all that implies) the number one thing in my life, so it makes sense that with my recent determination, these “elephant in the room” issues would march up to me and sit on my head! They were both my secret guilty indulgences. My favourite ways to keep being me.
I didn’t write anything yesterday as I hadn’t been able to really get back to a solid “feel good”. The working day was actually quite good though, and reading your message was so refreshing!
Time for a walk!
Cheers Andrew (link)
G’day Andrew,
I am pleased you could relate to that and recognize the “self-reproach in the humour” – not exactly being kind to yourself, isn’t it. And as a result of being aware of the “self-reproach” you discovered another “elephant in the room” named not being a friend to yourself – well done. It’s hard for me to picture you living life with two elephants “sit on your head”! What a hilarious metaphor, thank you for the humour.
Well, now that your “secret guilty indulgences” are out in the open you cannot maintain them any longer, these ones have lost their credibility. You are well on your way to unearth more of such ‘secrets’ which cannot survive honest scrutiny – and thus the reasons for not feeling good are diminished day by day.
Perhaps you can now understand what it means when Kuba said –
Kuba: I can experience what happens when for a period of time ‘I’ become somewhat diluted/irrelevant, then it is seen that ‘I’ have arrogated ‘myself’ over life with disastrous consequences, and then when this is seen all of a sudden everything is already in its rightful place. (link)
Or when I wrote –
Vineeto: I think the two most potent techniques at any stage in the process are
- being kind to yourself and
- put everything on an ‘it-doesn’t-really-matter’ basis.
If you can sincerely and consistently apply both these techniques, the process of undoing your ‘self’ is increasingly enjoyable and immense cause for appreciation. (link)
When you understand the principle how it works you can apply the same medicine for all the ‘elephant-issues’, or the same technique to all obstacles to enjoying and appreciating being alive right now, right here. Peter called his journal “Freedom … another word for nothing left to lose …” (paraphrasing from an old Janis Joplin song). It fits, doesn’t it?
Cheers Vineeto