The Orgastic 'Sweet Zone' Between Excitation & Release

I initially wrote this as a journal entry, but think it may merit its own post.

After having massive success the other day with the sexual ‘edging’ approach to isolate & stabilize purity, I have been looking for ways to continue to deepen my connection with it.


Now, to explain hovering indefinitely on that orgastic plateau which precedes an orgasm it may be of assistance to present it graphically: as an orgasm requires building up to a peak of sexual excitation, before tipping over the other side for a glorious slide down the slope on that other side of the mountain, it can be represented by an upside down ‘V’.

As the aim is to prolong that exquisite moment prior to tipping over the other side it requires a slight pulling-back downwards, of sexual excitation when an orgasm is imminent; within seconds, once the sexual excitation stabilises, it can be intensified once more; again, upon an orgasm being imminent, another slight pulling-back downwards, of sexual excitation is required; and once that sexual excitation stabilises, it too can be intensified once more … and so on and so on and so on. What will happen, upon much delicious practice – ain’t life grand! – is that the slight pulling-back downwards, of sexual excitation when the orgasm is once again imminent, becomes both easier and easier and less and less downwards; eventually there can be an easing back-and-forth, at the moment just prior to the orgasm’s imminence, along an ever-increasingly lengthening plateau at the peak; this can be represented by that upside down ‘V’ having a flat-line where there was once only an apex.

For a few days I have found myself quite overwhelmed by the experience, and it quickly became clear that feelings of over-excitement & love were to blame. These shifted into feelings of worry & depression after a couple of days.

Last night I had a stress-dream - the dream was of a workplace I had a few years ago which was very hectic, and at the time I was frequently overwhelmed. I wanted to go play soccer (aka go have fun), but more and more over-the top demands & complex tasks kept coming along, and I felt guilty about leaving my coworkers behind to go have fun. As a result, I was becoming more and more stressed out.

When I awoke, I reflected on the dream for a short while - my nerves were far too heightened to fall asleep.

After a short while, it occurred to me that the same dynamic was occurring with this stress & depression as Richard was describing in his approach to sexual excitement & release.

Namely, that the ‘typical’ way to approach sex was to simply ‘climb the mountain & then slide down the other side,’ which is to say to become excited, orgasm, and then quickly relax.

I was doing the same thing in my daily emotional life: rapidly becoming excited about this or that, releasing in some way or another (whether in accomplishment or disappointment), and then coming down. In my life this has at times looked quite extreme to the point of bipolarity, with cycles of around a year between the highest highs and lows lasting for months at a time.

It’s now obvious what there is to do: look for that ‘sweet zone’ near the peak of excitement but not so far as to push over the edge - in the past I have had no sense of modulation, and so would overshoot the sweet zone immediately. Once that happened, I would then spend some period of time more or less depressed. There was always considerable discomfort both in the intensity of the anxious-excitement & doubt ‘going up,’ and in the dark depressions of the lows.

By learning how to & knowing that I am capable of modulating that excitement, I can learn to have confidence in myself and enjoy the sweetness of feeling ‘fully alive’ without overshooting into mania.

This also changes the feeling-tone of the whole experience: rather than being some mysterious force outside of my control, it’s just something I’m learning to do, like riding a bicycle. Going forward, even if I tip too far one way or the other and skin my knee, I can confidently get back up again, knowing that it is possible and worth the effort to find out how.

Already just this mid-morning I have had success, watching as my ‘energy’ goes up, catching myself before it gets too hot, and then pushing myself a little higher when I start to get a little ‘sleepy,’ dull or down.

There is a sweetness in this space, a delight at being full of energy, and yet knowing that I will catch myself before it goes too far.

It is exactly the same as those sexual experiences, the psychic movements of which had more to do with my intuitive experiencing than physical sensation itself.

This all seems rather obvious now that I see it, but it was a significant shift for me, and thought I’d write it up in case others find it helpful.

Finally, I’d like to give additional thanks to @hunterad for bringing to my attention this quote, which all of the above is based on:

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A couple of additional notes while I’m here:

What I’m describing is hardly anything new, I’m just personally seeing it clearly for the first time. You’ll frequently hear athletes such as Tom Brady or Steph Curry talking about ‘not getting too high or too low.’

The mechanics of this too high / too low dynamic originate with neurotransmitters, which (mostly) come in two flavors: excitatory, and inhibitory. They both do exactly what it says on the tin: excite the nerves to fire, or inhibit the nerves from firing, thus preventing a thought from occurring or muscles from contracting.

This mechanism goes to the center of the function of all living things with nervous systems. The very logic of the psyche is built on those two impulses: ‘go,’ or ‘stop.’

When one has an extreme of either it causes problems: in humans, a large amount of excitatory neurotransmitters are characteristic of manic states, paranoia, anxiety, and schizophrenia, where large amounts of inhibitory neurotransmitters or lack of excitatory neurotransmitters are characteristics of dullness and depressive states. Both extremes lend themselves to delusions, just of different varieties.

Available pharmaceuticals for anxiety, depression, and a large number of other mental conditions, as well as many popular recreational drugs, all work by acting on neurotransmitters, though it is worth noting that neuroscience is a very young science and there is much we don’t know about their action.

Part of what led to making this connection was this post by @Kub933:

“At times (like was the case this weekend) this eventually leads to a very intense pressure building up in the nape of my neck, it can get pretty intense to the point of being quite painful. The pressure pain itself does not tend to last more than a day and the following day I find myself waking up once more experiencing heightened levels of this sparkling clarity.
Sometimes it gets to a point where as I am having my morning coffee and cigarette the experience of the world around gets too overwhelming (like too much all at once), this can sometimes cause ‘me’ to come back even stronger or other times (as did this weekend) I find myself experiencing actuality.”

When high levels of excitatory neurotransmitters are present, there is increased sensitivity to sensations, colors, and light. This was also observable in Richard shortly after he became free - he had a period where he couldn’t drink coffee because it would overwhelm his senses. He described it as being as if his brain was trying to process multiple TV channels at the same time. So it is something that is as relevant after freedom as it is before.

Significantly, both coffee and cigarettes cause increases of dopamine in the brain, which can act as an excitatory neurotransmitter.

I was also reminded of Vineeto’s advice to @geoffrey following his becoming free: “Once the guardian has abdicated you are then able to allow the experience of infinitude and the utter purity of its perfection to happen, slowly, gently, as much as you can bear, again and again.


Yes, I have found this to be helpful. I have mastered the orgastic plateau with the help of testosterone injections and ed meds which is needed at my age. However, I have never considered extending this plateauing into my everyday life. Not sure how I am going to do this but I am considering it now.

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The key is in seeing the similarities between sexual excitation & ordinary, daily, run-of the mill excitation.

Good luck!

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Thanks, I may need it. Right now, I can see no comparison between orgastic plateauing and everyday run of the mill excitation.

Do you ever find other things in life than sex exciting? Perhaps reading something interesting, or the sight of a spectacular sunset? The prospect of going on a vacation?

That kind of excitement is not even in the same ballpark as orgastic plateauing.

Not yet!

“Because when there is actual intimacy there is a pleasure that is more substantial, more of the earth, of me – of my body – and all of my body is intimate. It is that orgastic sensation”.


Yes, that sounds like the orgastic plateau. Like I’m having actual intimacy with my body but I haven’t touched anywhere near that w/o having sex. Maybe that’s what I like about weed. There is a kind of plateauing although nowhere near the orgastic plateau.

The main thing is that it happens with similar mechanics, though with sex the pleasure / orgastic sensation is miles more obvious.

What was most helpful for me was that the sex made me aware of what type of pleasure + intuitive experience to aim for, how to maintain it, and now I’m looking for it in other moments as well - such as sitting here typing, right now.

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You have put it excellently. I see what you are saying.

This was a very interesting read! I’ve never thought about it that way outside of sexual matters. But I have noticed the same things that you mention in my life. In particular, the teetering back and forth between the highest highs and lowest lows. Although I’ve never given it that much thought, I’ve found myself thinking after a bout of being deep in the pits that ‘okay it’s time for me to feel good and happy again’. A hazy recognition that I’m just blindly shuttling up and down. It’s like that’s just the nature of desire to go back and forth and follow nature’s program if it’s not being actively and intentionally directed. It does make sense as that’s pretty much what you are doing by choosing to actively feel good each moment again. The sweet zone in that case being the felicitous feelings.

I do think it’s subtly different than the intuitively-experienced happy/felicitous, which is its own ingredient which must be sought, and which can be experienced regardless of where one is on the high energy/low energy spectrum. For example, in the initial quote Richard emphasizes being appreciative that the other in the sexual congress is choosing to be there, out of all the places he or she could be in the world.

Additional evidence of this is Richard experiencing ‘too much’ after freedom, and that there is still that spectrum of ‘allowing the purity’ to a greater or lesser extent.

I’m thinking of this primarily as a good way to position for the optimum to occur. I want to be as alive/awake as possible, without running ‘too hot.’ And there is an inherent pleasantness to being in that zone, similar to an engine humming along at its optimum operating RPM.

There is something self-defining in it that if we’re in that zone we’re probably doing well, because the Self will dump cold water to ‘turn off’ or get too excited with positive-loving emotions.