Hi Claudiu,
To pre-empt anyone misunderstanding your summary description of that you “see I am guilty no-matter-what, just for being-a-feeling-being”, lest it be taken as merely a rational understanding (a concept) and not an experiential in-depth insight and actualisation (traversing the territory, so to speak), let me just reinsert what prompted me to write to Kuba –
Vineeto: “… there is one more step – having solved the mystery you can now wrest your fascinated (still ‘self’-centric) attention away from “‘me’ at the core of ‘my’ being” (like from a thrilling movie) and look around.” (link)
Here is how Kuba described his experience –
Kuba: I know that I am proceeding in the correct direction lately because ‘I’ am proceeding as a whole. And I see now back when ‘I’ was experiencing the “unpalatable resistance” it was because ‘I’ was split in 2, and the wall that ‘I’ was running into (which would push ‘me’ back more the harder ‘I’ ran) was also ‘me’. (link)
In other words, via fascinated attention he has successfully identified and stopped in its track the common habit of putting aside, pushing away or rationalising any unpleasant/ unwanted/ disagreeable feelings each time they occurred, and thus is now able to fully experience and embrace those feelings as ‘me’ – “proceeding as a whole”.
As such he is able to say –
Kuba: So ‘I’ am no longer split, and now ‘I’ am beginning to dare to allow ‘myself’ to be seen at the core of ‘my’ being. (link)
This daring “to be seen at the core of ‘my’ being”, this utter sincerity of who ‘I’ am, is the key to naiveté. So when you say you “see I am guilty no-matter-what, just for being-a-feeling-being” this insight can relieve the guilt for being a feeling ‘being’ – for ‘Vineeto’ it fuelled her sincere intent to ‘get it done sooner rather than later’, but ‘she’ still had to identify and fully embrace all the other feelings whenever they stood in the way of unrestricted enjoyment and appreciation of each moment of being alive.
Perhaps your statement that “then there’s nothing to do, except for, allow the actualism process to unfold” is a bit premature? Of course, only you can know if in the course of the day/ the week/ the month you have nothing at all to hide, and naïveté can unfold without impediment.
Claudiu: It’s very straightforward how there’s a problem (I am rotten to the core), and then once seen, the obvious solution. What would normally make the ‘problem’ hard to see is there being no solution… but there is one! A very simple one too haha (link)
Ha, it is “very straightforward” in theory and many actualists are aware of this – but is it “very simple” in reality?
But then, your insight that “I am rotten to the core” could have struck so deeply that it removed any obstacle/ objection to going “blessedly into oblivion” – this would be truly wonderful.
What you are indicating with your use of the term “actualism process” – unless I misunderstand you – is that you are now in a “different-way-of being” (an ongoing EE) –
Richard to Claudiu: As for your query regarding how the intimacy experience (IE) differs from an excellence experience (EE): qualitatively they are much the same, or similar, insofar as with both experiences there is a near-absence of agency – the beer rather than the doer is the operant – whereupon naïveté has come to the fore, such as to effect the marked diminishment of separation, and the main distinction is that the IE is more people-oriented, while the EE tends to be environmental in its scope.
In other words, with an EE the ‘aesthetic experience’ feature, for instance, or its ‘nature experience’ aspect, for example, tends to be more prominent, whilst with an IE the ‘fellowship experience’ characteristic, for instance, or its ‘convivial experience’ quality, for example, comes to the fore. In either type of near-PCE – wherein the experiencing is of ‘my’ life living itself, with a surprising sumptuosity, rather than ‘me’ living ‘my’ life, quite frugally by comparison, and where this moment is living ‘me’ (instead of ‘me’ trying to live ‘in the moment’) – the diminishment of separation is so astonishing as to be as-if incomprehensible/ unbelievable yet it is the imminence of a fellow human’s immanence (‘the state or condition of existing or operating within’ or ‘existing or remaining within; inherent’ or ‘remaining within; indwelling; inherent’) which, in and of itself, emphases the distinction the most.
For instance, the degree of intimacy experienced with minera, flora and fauna upon strolling through some botanical gardens with either near-PCE occurring – as in, with rocks, trees and birds, for example – is to the same gradation as when in a social setting such as a typical sitting room situation (as in, with ashtrays, flowers and humans, for instance) yet it is the ‘fellow human being’ element which exemplifies the already astounding diminishment of separation which ensues upon the blessed onset of this near-innocent intimacy of naïveté.
And that latter point – the felicitous advent of naïve intimacy – is another way the IE differs from the EE inasmuch if a near-PCE is initiated via intensive interaction with a fellow human being/ with fellow human beings it takes on the properties of an intimacy experience (IE) whereas if the near-PCE is triggered via interacting intensively with the world at large (as in, an aesthetic experience, a nature experience, a contemplative experience, for example) it takes on the properties of an excellence experience (EE).
The role they play in an out-from-control/ different-way-of-being virtual freedom (entitled ‘The Dynamic, Destinal Virtual Freedom’ on that web page to distinguish it from the still-in-control/ same-way-of-being virtual freedom entitled ‘The Pragmatic, Methodological Virtual Freedom’) is, essentially, in enabling the actualism process to take over.
In effect, the actualism process is what ensues when one gets out from being under control, via having given oneself prior permission to have one’s life live itself (i.e., sans the controlling doer), and a different way of being comes about (i.e., where the beer is the operant) – whereupon a thrilling out-from-control momentum takes over and an inevitability sets in – whereafter there is no pulling back (hence the reluctance in having it set in motion) as once begun it is nigh-on unstoppable.
Then one is in for the ride of a lifetime! (Richard, List D, Claudiu4, #innocence)
Cheers Vineeto