Journal de Henry

Yes certainly I wasn’t suggesting that going back to trading solely physical goods would be the solution, of course this is way too impractical. I don’t think I was thinking as far as solutions just yet :laughing:

It is fascinating to begin exploring this topic of exploitation and peasant mentality. I have experienced it since yesterday as if these clouds that were the remnant and unexplored aspects of social identity / peasant mentality have began clearing away and making way for an even greater freedom.

It clicked today initially when I was working and it got quite busy all of a sudden, there was this habituated response to take it seriously, with some degree of stress, it seemed like it was a severe matter, one that would be worth putting myself under stress for, hurting myself for even. Then I saw how utterly silly this is, to sign away my well-being for what? I just couldn’t take it seriously anymore, for any serious values were imbibed from others, others who are of course invested in the apparent seriousness of it all as it would put further money into their pocket. How could I take their values seriously, how could I hurt myself for this.

After work driving to teach BJJ it was the same sense of freedom and a thought of “how could I take life seriously because of their values”, values which were never designed with my well-being in mind, I couldn’t anymore.

The fascinating thing is that in the past I thought that seeing things in this way would make me almost unable to function in society, would I just pick fights with everyone all the time? But it is not like that at all, there is just the freedom from having to take life seriously and the freedom to act sensibly.

It looks that something has shifted although I don’t have the specifics worked out yet. But before it was that I explored the various beliefs that constituted ‘my’ social identity and worked through them one by one.
But there was this whole other angle that I never saw, which was the peasant mentality and the exploitation inherent in it. This is what clicked it seems, and it has provided this surety and this inability to take any of those values seriously anymore.

I am fascinated to see what is still left of it, but for now it is like the last legs that this thing was standing on have been kicked out. Because there were already some significant dents in the construct of ‘my’ social identity and now I discovered that this entire system has no redeeming features whatsoever and it seems I just stepped out of it, as in I quit playing that game even though I still show up to work etc.

It seems that his thread that was pulled out just keeps going, for those values from the social identity / peasant mentality would trickle-down even into my table manners or how I relate with the shopkeeper. It is such an incredible freedom, it’s unbelievable that this is possible whilst still remaining a ‘self’.

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