James: Yes, in rereading all of this things are shaping up. What I have gathered so far:
By accepting the fact of my impending physical death I have opened the door to self-immolation.
Richard said above that only altruistic self-immolation will do it and that in the meanwhile minimizing both the ‘bad’ and ‘good’ feelings and maximising the felicitous feelings is better than trying to eliminate them because this will have immediate benefit of feeling happy and harmless while rewiring the brain before the once-in-a-lifetime event happens which wipes out the identity in toto.
In summary: By accepting the fact of my impending physical death I can now be happy and harmless while readying myself for an altruistic self-immolation.
I will keep re-reading the whole page in the discussion with Richard as you suggested.
By accepting the fact of my impending death I have given up the addiction to being ‘me’ and am ready to venture into the unknown as you suggested. It is noted that you suggested ‘with utter sincerity’. I have always been sincere but not utterly sincere. Thanks for posting this discussion with Richard. I have finally gotten what he said all those years ago that it is the addiction to being ‘me’ that has to be given up and I have finally done that. (link)
Hi James,
This is a good exegesis and it is significant that you recognized the difference between sincerity and ‘utter sincerity’, between being sincere and being utterly sincere. It has already shown some results.
Now you have something inspiring to live for, and a dedicatory aim which makes your remaining days thoroughly fascinating in your utterly sincere exploration of whatever is preventing you from feeling excellent, naïve, daring and caring, and appreciative of living on this wonderful planet earth. There is nothing tepid or lacklustre in the felicitous feelings of benignity and benevolence, exuberance and passionate caring.
Whilst you can investigate the operation of the instinctual passions, you cannot eliminate them until self-immolation. Instead, you channel all those passions into exciting, thrilling determination to keep exploring the deepest corners of your psyche whenever you find anything impeding your feeling wonderful, buoyant and on top of the world. You desire finding ‘the meaning of life’ like you never desired anything before.
Richard: Speaking personally from experience, eventually – and ultimately – all the instincts are undone instantly via psychological and psychic ‘self’-sacrifice. This is, purely and simply, altruism at its very best … and altruism’s energy is an instinctual passion (this is indeed hoisting oneself by one’s bootstraps … writ large). However, until the initiation of the process that leads to ‘self’-immolation is consciously triggered – whereupon the ending of ‘me’ happens of its own accord – one can become acutely aware of the operation of the instinctual passions as they are experienced moment-to-moment. It is but the same ‘How am I experiencing this moment of being alive?’ investigation of beliefs and feelings … only extended deeper into one’s psyche.
Strangely enough, it does mean an exploration into the psychic realm … which is why it is essential that one first establishes a firm base – called virtual freedom – to fall back upon when the going gets tough. A journey into one’s psyche – which is the human psyche – is not for the faint of heart or the weak of knee … one must have nerves of steel to go all the way. The rewards for doing so are immense, however, and the ramifications far-reaching.
It means peace-on-earth, in this life-time, as this flesh and blood body. [Emphases added]. (Richard, AF List, Mark, 18 May 1999).
Richard: It is such a monumental thing to have happen: this event is the pivotal point wherein all the wars and murders and rapes and tortures and domestic violence and child abuse and sadness and loneliness and grief and depression and suicides and the such-like in one human being come to an end permanently.
In a word: innocence. (Richard, List B, No. 33c, 23 June 2000)
Your explorations and dedication to peace-on-earth may well be an inspiration for others too.
Cheers Vineeto