Vineeto: I am curious in what way this account of Richard’s one-off period of mental anguish – while he was working out what this entirely new experience of human consciousness was all about – gives you courage?
Andrew: The way is gives me courage is that if he can go through all of that, on his own as far as what was happening to him, and its implications, and of course the entire experience itself of being like a “bad trip” 3 times a day!, then surely I can keep making progress this time, as I am not on my own. I have you and this forum, the AFT, and a fresh start each day. I am not having to go through war, or mental breakdowns et al.
Hi Andrew,
Thank you for explaining it to me. I am pleased to read you have been encouraged that you “can keep making progress this time” as you are “not on my own” like Richard was. Besides, there is now a Direct Route where you can avoid the toxic state of enlightenment altogether on your way to an actual freedom.
Andrew: I can get “on the front foot” with my experiences, prepared with what I have learnt. Especially over the last 2 months in beginning to think clearly (going back to the initial question) and the last few weeks of renewed enthusiasm and successes. (link)
I remember that it was also a wonderful and encouraging experience for ‘Vineeto’ to use ‘her’ brain again for what it is intended –
‘VINEETO’: It was great fun for me to de-rust my brain and train it so I could work out my emotions, beliefs and finally the instincts. The brain is the only tool we have to re-wire our brain, as strange as it may sound. (…)
With a switched on brain, TV can become a useful tool to study the Human Condition, not only in me, but in its workings in everybody. Oprah Winfrey is a goldmine of information, and her all-round spirituality, that includes everyone’s superstitions, is quite revealing. You are making your own observations – but for me, I always used them back on me, to check my fears, my superstitions, my hypocrisy. And it helps immensely to remember that they are the Human Condition, in all of us, and not a personal quirk. I don’t find TV to be an idiot box at all. One doesn’t need to switch one’s brain off when watching… quite the contrary, it can be a fascinating source of valuable information for exploring the Human Condition. (Vineeto, No. 6, 6.2.1999)
Andrew to Kuba: One that really had that feeling of freshness come back was reading this;
Richard: Just because there are no affections whatsoever it does not mean it is not possible to be (mentally) astonished, astounded, surprised, uncertain, baffled, puzzled, perplexed, nonplussed, and so on, on occasion. (Richard, AF List, No. 106, 27 Dec 2005).
Andrew to Kuba: I still had an expectation that Actual Freedom was something more like a cosmic mind/ intelligence. Not that I ever had that explicit thought, but it was still there. There was a lot that on reading it all again, from the “long awaited announcements” and reports, that I now see I was fitting it all into a convoluted religio-spiritual devotee mindset. A mystic, if you will. (link)
Yes, this is quite understandable – after all, Richard often said that an actual freedom is “unbelievable, unimaginable, inconceivable and incomprehensible” . Fortunately he has left us many detailed descriptions of how he experienced life in the actual world. One of the most astounding experiences for me is that it is always now, that this moment is ever-fresh –
Richard: And as the slowly-setting sun streams golden from the west another world entirely hoves into view.
Pristine and pure, ever-fresh and new, peerless perfection permeates all and sundry, without exception, and he knows with a certainty that his life is never going to be the same ever again. (Richard, List D, No. 33, 13 Jan 2013)
He was such a master of words as well.
Here are some more, for your delectation and apprehension so that your previous conception/ mindset can definitely be replaced now with a more factual understanding.
Richard: There is nothing except the series of sensations which happen … not happening to an ‘I’ or a ‘me’ but just happening … moment by moment … one after another. To live life as these sensations, as distinct from having them, engenders the most astonishing sense of freedom and magic. Consequently, I am living in peace and tranquillity; a meaningful peace and tranquillity. Life is intrinsically purposeful, the reason for existence lies openly all around. Being this very air I live in, I am constantly aware of it as I breathe it in and out; I see it, I hear it, I taste it, I smell it, I touch it, all of the time. It never goes away – nor has it ever been away – it was just that ‘I’ and/or ‘me’ was standing in the way of the meaning of life being apparent. (Richard, AF List, No. 4, 14 Jan 1999).
Richard: No boredom or fear whatsoever. This moment has never happened before and never will happen again … thus life is always ever-fresh, novel, original, unique, peerless, matchless and impeccable. (…)
If there is a situation that calls for a considered response there is an active thinking of possibilities and probabilities – an exploring of feasible courses of action – based upon past experience and knowledge. Then the issue is ‘banished’ to the back of the skull where it all gets sorted out of its own accord. Sometimes the outcome is very surprising. For the most of the day there is either few or no thoughts running at all … none whatsoever. If thought is needed for a particular situation, it swings smoothly into action and effortlessly does its thing. All the while, there is this apperceptive awareness of being here … of being alive in the infinitude of this universe. No words occur … it is a wordless appreciation of being able to be here, now. Doing something – and that includes thinking – is a bonus of pleasure and delight on top of this on-going ambrosial experience of being alive and awake and here … now. Consequently, my life is always blithe and carefree, even if I am doing nothing. (Richard, AF List, No. 7, 27 Jan 1999).
Richard: The value of it is an individual peace-on-earth for No. 4. When there are six billion outbreaks of individual peace-on-earth there will be global peace-on-earth. Thus all the wars and rapes and murders and tortures and domestic violence and child abuse and sadness and loneliness and grief and depression and suicide will be at an end. Now that is value, eh?
Yet there is more … you will have solved the ‘mystery of life’ and be living the actual. You will be the universe’s experience of itself as a sensate and reflective human being. You will be living the infinitude of the universe’s infinite space and eternal time – here and now – instead of waiting for some specious immortality after physical death.
You will be living – as I do – in the fairy-tale-like actual world with its quality of magical perfection and purity. Everything and everyone has a lustre, a brilliance, a vividness, an intensity and a marvellous, wondrous vitality that makes everything alive and sparkling … even the very earth beneath one’s feet. The rocks, the concrete buildings, a piece of paper … literally everything is as if it were alive. A rock is not, of course, alive as humans are, or as animals are, or as trees are. This ‘aliveness’ is the very actuality of all existence … the actualness of everything and everyone.
We do not live in an inert universe … but one cannot experience this whilst clinging to immortality. (Richard, List B, No. 4a, 9 Dec 1998).
Richard: One cannot think or feel one’s way into this magical world – the world as-it-is in actuality – but one does need an absolute conviction that such a world exists. This conviction comes out of the pure consciousness experience … and these peak experiences are momentary glimpses into the actual, the world of pristine perfection. To reiterate: in the PCE, it is immediately seen that ‘I’ do not actually exist. (…) (Richard, AF List, Alana, 20 Aug 1999).
Alan: And ‘I’ do not want to give up the adventure, so some persuasion, or altruism?, is necessary.
Richard: Ahh … after ‘the adventure’ is over something far, far better takes its place.
Alan: What?
Richard: First, there is the not-so-little matter of seducing one’s fellow human being into being happy and harmless – when it does not really matter whether anyone else becomes free of the human condition or not – and in this there is a thrill that is not of fear (because of a familiarity that knows naught of sorrow and malice). But it is the on-going experiencing of the purity of the perfection of the infinitude of this wondrous universe – an experiencing that defies all the odds – which is truly magical. Being intimately here at this place in infinite space, right now at this moment in eternal time, is such an adventure in itself that it makes what ‘I’ did all those years ago pale into insignificance. There is so much more to life than the process of becoming free … even though that is the journey of a lifetime in itself. Let alone doing something so commonplace as that which normally constitutes ‘an adventure’, for those antics amount to nothing but silly risk-taking for the sake of unconvincing adrenaline rush.
What I am saying is that whatever I do is an amazing escapade. (Mailing List 'AF' Respondent Alan human being into being happy).
You’ll find more descriptions in Richard’s Selected Correspondence on Actual Freedom2 and his Selected Writing on Actual Freedom. Also Frequent Questions No. 26 might give you some illuminating answers.
Cheers Vineeto