Milito’s Journal

[milito.paz]

@claudiu

Such an actuality-mimicking one doesn’t have these hallmarks you mention of love, sorrow, etc. I speak from experience!

’
I was clearer and mentioned more than just those two things when you later described one of your ASCs.

@claudiu

Well yes, that’s what I meant by you thinking you’re newly free .

Well yes. What is happening here is that there is the thought here that I am free and Claudiu (and perhaps others) doubt this. So be it.

@claudiu

Well it’s an odd thing to say. Why not follow the lead and advice of someone who became free? That’s the whole point of actualism - to become actually free by using the techniques, methods, etc., that have worked for other people to become actually free. It’s an empirically-devised and empirically-validated method. It’s what we all do here, follow in the footsteps of those who succeeded. Enjoying & appreciating is following in their footsteps, because that is what worked for them.

My response isn’t odd; it’s based on my understanding of the diverse nature of individual experiences and paths to freedom on what is a very wide (and wondrous) path. Instead of discouraging learning from others, I merely emphasise the uniqueness of each person’s journey (how enjoying and appreciating pans out for them) What is wrong with that? This perspective underscores the value of individuality. Jeez, Vineeto can cry when a cop writes her a ticket and Richard can chase someone who stole something from his shopping trolley (oooh how potentially dangerous! he could’ve got stabbed) but I can’t express this?

In my experience, enjoying and appreciating isn’t following in their footsteps it is treading your own path.

@claudiu

Also rather odd. Tarin & Trent led many many people astray, away from actualism. They certainly bear some culpability in that. Of course it’s ultimately up to anyone to do what they please, but that doesn’t mean actions don’t have consequences.

In any case, it doesn’t change the point that if you aren’t newly free, but are in an actuality-mimicking ASC, nobody on here should be taking any heed of what you’re saying or doing — regardless of whether you share any culpability in that.

If I’m not free, it’s fair for each person to decide how to interpret what I say. Blaming me for potential negative influences overlooks individual responsibility. However, disregarding my words solely due to doubts about my freedom overlooks their potential value. It’s crucial to assess the substance of what I say rather than focusing solely on my state of freedom.

@claudiu

Dunking on the way the AFT site looks is somewhat odd. As well as indicating earlier that there is “actualist dogma” that you aren’t following (“I dunno maybe I’m deviating from actualist dogma again.”). Grant tried that also, dismissing actualism as a worldview or narrative vs the factuality that it is.

I like the look of the site. I’ve always liked text based sites. Oh and there does seem to be a dogmatic line amongst those who identify/say they are practising actualism. I find this undeniable. But deeming actualism a dogma? I fully endorse every word they write on that site.

@claudiu

Also rather odd. In my PCEs I am aware full well that I exist, actually exist, as a flesh and blood body. It is actual existence as opposed to imagined existence. So it is the flesh and blood body that would find it sensible to be highly discerning (or not as the case may be).

You just don’t get it. When you are in the PCEs and aware that you exist as a flesh and blood body (I was referring to ‘self’ that goes into abeyance) do you Step 1. find it sensible to do something then Step 2. do it? What are the mechanics of that process? Because if that is what happens maybe we should be questioning the validity of your PCE claims. For me it was always (and is permanently now) a spontaneous and continuous flow of action and thought.

This all seems to be some big intellectual exercise when I thought this place is all about exchanging notes about experience.

@claudiu

Another odd thing. My suggestion to “wait it out” is to wait for further information to become available before making the conclusion that you are newly free. Here you are implying that to take this prudent course of action is to be perpetuating (via inaction) the violence and atrocities in Gaza. It is a strange connection to make, and indicates a pressuring of the other to accept you as newly free.

No. If anything your response can be said to be odd. But I’m coming to expect such responses now. What do you think I am doing? Running around preaching? I am living my life. Working, cooking, childrearing, reading, etc. I am not making any conclusions. I am sharing what I experience and what I think. Take it or leave it. You are making the extremely strange connection, suggesting that I am taking your suggestion to wait as perpetuating violence in Gaza when what I meant was what is unsafe about what I am doing? If you want to talk about danger look at Gaza. That is what I meant.

@claudiu

Why draw a connection between waiting before concluding that you are free, and the violence and atrocities happening in Gaza, then?

I didn’t you misunderstood me.

@claudiu

In that case it narrows it down from 3 possibilities to 2: either you are newly free, or you are very deeply in an actuality-mimicking ASC!

Time will tell, Gaza notwithstanding.

That is your opinion.

@claudiu

It’s not an apology . It’s a pre-emptive explanation that I am not seeking a personal vendetta against you or anything like this.

I didn’t think it was. I was referring to my telling you previously not to apologise as indicating that I am on a roll not-taking-things-personally wise.

@claudiu

I think the frequent listing off of stuff you do/have done/are doing/will do, as in a list of accomplishments, is also indicative of an elevated/passionate mood (albeit not being experienced as such) rather than apperceptive consciousness. I say it because you asked me to highlight these things

It reminds me of Alan & Bub more so than Richard, Vineeto, Peter, Geoffrey, Srinath.

They aren’t accomplishments they are shares of things I would have liked those guys you mentioned to have shared when I was still a feeling-being (yes I know you think I still am one). I never used to write. And I am starting to consider maybe just waiting for people to ask me stuff if they are interested instead of spontaneously sharing. Because this doesn’t seem to be going anywhere. It is at best good mental gymnastics for me.

@claudiu

That sounds great, and not manic, but whence the writing in a “hyper excited fashion” then if this stillness is the basis of your consciousness now?

That was before. The stillness is progressively greater. It’s the mental swirl I mentioned in another post that led to the ‘hyper excited fashion’. Like the body was trying to keep up with the amount of stuff my mind was trying to release into my post.

@claudiu

While taking no responsibility at all with what you’re communicating if you’re mistaken about your being actually free?

"RESPONDENT: Does responsibility and seriousness come with being carefree?

RICHARD: no, the utter reliability of being always happy and harmless replaces the onerous burden of being responsible … and actuality’s blithe sincerity dispenses with the gloomy seriousness that epitomises adulthood.

It is funny – in a peculiar way – for I often gain the impression when I speak to others, that I am spoiling their game-plan. It seems as if they wish to search forever … they consider arriving to be boring. How can unconditional peace and happiness, twenty-four-hours-a-day, possibly be boring? Is a carefree life all that difficult to comprehend? Why persist in a sick game … and defend one’s right to do so? Why insist on suffering when blitheness is freely available here and now? Is a life of perennial gaiety something to be scorned? I have even had people say, accusingly, that I could not possibly be happy when there is so much suffering going on in the world. The logic of this defies credibility: Am I to wait until everybody else is happy before I am? If I was to wait, I would be waiting forever … for under this twisted rationale, no one would dare to be the first to be happy. Their peculiar reasoning allows only for a mass happiness to occur globally; overnight success, as it were. Someone has to be intrepid enough to be first, to show what is possible to a benighted humanity."

@claudiu

Well it’s not surprising that if the first joke fell flat, this follow-up also did haha.

Again don’t really see the joke. You seem to be poking fun of me not understanding what you mean by saying you don’t care. Keep in mind I have experienced actual caring in PCEs before, I know experientially the topics being discussed here.

Well let’s just say I’m starting to pick up on your sense of humour (or lack thereof). Noted.

@claudiu

In any case this is not dispositive, if you were indeed newly free then that seems like a perfectly reasonable thing to be experiencing and reporting haha.

I just thought that Paul might like to know that.

Good morning/evening/night
Milito