Ohhhh or wait is he saying that
Rather than trying to realize or figure out what the foreboding event might be that is causing a deep feeling of read (ie I am dreading something, what am I dreading?)…
Instead of that (looking ‘outward’ at what the event might be) it is instead an opportune moment to look inward, at the depths of ‘my’ very ‘being’ itself, which (with pure intent) " can enable a movement into the existential angst […] which movement facilitates the bright light of awareness being shone into the innermost recesses of ‘my’ presence … which is ‘presence’ itself" – and this can then “reveal that ‘presence’ itself feeds off ‘my’ fear” which “functional acuity brings an abrupt end to its nourishment”
So it is kinda funny in that ‘realizing’ the event-that-I-am-dreading ends up being the “avoidance” of looking at the dread itself/why dread manifests in the first place/‘my’ being itself