Thanks for responding @Vineeto and @claudiu!
@claudiu, good to read your report - your description of a PCE feels familiar as there’s a number of experiences i’ve had as well where the world seemed vivid, sparkling, incredible, fun and light. It also felt like there was no “me” and without me, life was perfect, the meaning of life was in the living and this was the most obvious thing in the world. These are very much the experiences that drove me in this direction.
However there are other parts of Richard/Vineeto’s description like centerlessness and contact with infinity which I did not directly experience in those incredible moments (even though there felt like there was no “me”, and i had an understanding of infinity, there must have been some sense of center and slight separation from it). The moments where the center died and raw infinity coursed through me had a different flavor because they were so fundamentally different, it was very very overwhelming and disorienting. But I guess as @Vineeto said, it probably means there were still remnants of me left to feel this overwhelm
So I guess I’ve never experienced it all at once - total complete centerlessness and contact with infinity, at the same time that everything seems magical and fun and perfect. The centerlessness actually quite surprised me when I first experienced it because I couldn’t fathom until then how total the obliteration would be, and it had seemed to me that perfect happiness was possible with the far more shallow disappearance of “me” that had revealed the meaning of life prior. I wonder if this is the difference between basic and actual freedom