Claudiu and myself have been a little busy on the DHO lately!
I think we’re both interested in presenting actualism to interested persons in a non-adversarial way - which BTW I think has unnecessarily (or necessarily?) characterised previous encounters.
One good idea to come out of this was the suggestion of a Bullet Point list. I never been partial to lists like these, but I think it’s a good idea to start a Wiki that is less discursive and more point by point for those who might find it useful.
I’m happy to contribute and edit, but it will be good to have some collaborators. Who’s in?
@solvann it looks like you are the theme and design wiz here. Any ideas about a new theme for actualism.online blog? Something that is colourful, modern and stylish that works for a blog that has different writers would be nice.
I have read it all and it really seems an excellent discussion so far, both in substance and in form.
Regarding the form, I think it is very useful for all of us that the participants have openly raised the difficulties that many have historically encountered in reading Richard.
At the same time, I found it important and appropriate that you and @claudiu have openly stated the differences between the way Richard had to disseminate, discuss and present AF, and the way we can now choose to disseminate, discuss and present it. And I think both of you have presented it very clearly and concisely.
It is preferable for someone coming from a spiritual discipline to dismiss AF due to considering it impossible/incredible that such a simple method (as @claudiu pointed out) will deliver the goods, than to dismiss it for not being able to distill the method due to lack of clarity (as experienced by many).
So generating a bullet list seems to me another great idea to experiment with a variety of ways to present AF.
Richard, Vineeto and Peter were often facing down some pretty aggressive posters and I’m glad its not something we need to do - well at least not for now
On the other hand, I do read some of the responses on the AFT and think that they could have been handled a little better. I do think a blunt, overly logical, precise style that involves a lot of quoting and scare-quoting has a tendency to get under peoples skin and actively work against conveying ones point. I’m of the ‘get more flies with honey than vinegar’ school. Then again it can be useful - if you are prepared to undergo trial by fire as I once did It can be a very clear and direct form of communication, that leaves no room for doubt.
I think the “honey vs vinegar” analogy is apt. For the most part, what is lacking in the world is cooperation and understanding. Competition, argumentative logic (most online discussions are men where “logic” is a dominant identity issue ) and the weakness text itself, are as much to blame as the so called “human condition” in failing to understand the simplicity of actualism.
Or maybe that is a redundant position, in that one leads from the other anyway.
I am still very much of the opinion we see far less success because we rely on text.
@Andrew maybe so re: the masculine argumentative logic point. My hunch is that mainly the actualist paradigm is quite unique, contra to anything else out there and hence difficult for most people to get their heads around.
Still I don’t think we’ve quite maxed out our range of communication possibilities. Not everyone is a reader. Even less so today. I do think that video, podcasting and live conversations are seriously underused avenues for us. You have been banging on about this for a while I know and I’m only just beginning to catch up
Banging on for a decade at least. Finally we have a proper forum!
However, it’s also my own weakness. I could have pushed for more phone convos and friendships.
The proper ‘actualist’ explanation is that ‘i’ have a vested interest in not engaging with others at the level of friendship and verbal / video conversations. I actually agree, because i see this resistance in myself and others here.
I think we ignore how powerful normal friendship is. We don’t leverage it.
For example, @claudiu opened up on the DhO about finally beginning to date. I was encouraging him in 2015 when he still had a very magnificent beard to do that.
But we shy away from each other.
We don’t see that the most important people in the world for the purpose of freedom is each other.
The ‘real’ wins.
As long as we think that we are somehow obliged to “do this alone”, the more it will be that we fall far behind those previous systems (Buddhism in particular) for success.
I am often reminded how scathing Richard is of the failure of traditional systems, yet here we are 30 years (to the year) after he became free, with barely two handfuls of successes.
Buddha closed out his life with hundreds.
I think a bit of ‘Srinath’ is needed; “if these jokers can do it, so can i”
Better than getting the word out (the scatter gun approach), is getting messy with those already interested.
@Srinath It is really interesting that your communication style is much different to Richard for example, I personally find your style more easily digestible and relatable, dare I say it comes across more human
Although that has probably everything to do with the reader, for example I often find that I re-read some of Richards writings and I finally get the brilliance of what he is saying.
There was always a evangelical naivete to Richard. Something that actually rubbed me the wrong way, having spent the first 25 years of my lifetime in radical evangelism.
But, it is exactly that. A naivete that only someone not brought up in a evangelical religion can actually have.
An extremely non-compromising, to the point of getting under the skin, approach that only an ex “sensitive” soul could muster. I am clear now that th personality remains after freedom. What makes sense, still makes sense.
I just finished reading all the DHO posts so far, it was actually useful for me to re-read some of the basic ideas surrounding actualism to see how my current understanding holds up.
I have to say @claudiu and @Srinath I am impressed at your willingness to continue with these discussions, clearing up 1 bit of misinformation/misrepresentation after another and in a really effective manner too.
Personally I don’t have an interest in these sort of conversations at all, if someone is interested in actually doing something about their situation (maybe due to memories of PCEs or realising that the other alternatives suck) I can talk with them till the cows come home.
It seems to me that if someone is genuinely interested/moved to do something about the human condition in this lifetime then it does not need to be spoon-fed to them. It seems the same old pattern always emerges, essentially turning any attempt at open and sincere communication into some mind numbing discussion about why Actualism is nothing new or why Spirituality already has it worked out
But I guess that is precisely why I am not posting on the DHO , but I get similar responses from most people I meet who might be interested to begin with, as soon as it clicks that they will need to actually question and change what they hold most dear any genuine interest stops.
I always liked Peters writings and something he mentioned a lot is that Actualism is 180 degrees opposite to what everyone is doing. It seems unless this point is firmly grasped all discussion devolves into something that’s neither here nor there, just a quarrelling over this or that concept instead of getting stuck into actually doing something.
For me the reason why Actualism just clicked was because of a memory of an outstanding PCE which haunted me for years and now I had a way to be in that place again.
And even though the AFT was hard to navigate and there was misinformation about and I was young and didn’t know what to do and I was involved in Spirituality and had to discard a bunch of stuff, and I was deeply unhappy/anxious in day to day life… In short I was not able to apply the method at all, but deep down I just knew that I had to eventually suss it out and I would find a way one way or another, because I saw in that PCE that something so much better was possible. I don’t see any of that sort of willingness in the people I talk to or when I read these sort of discussions.
I have had reservations about ‘getting the word out’ due to the low success rate of it and also the proselytizing aspect of it which I equate to religion. However, if Richard had not come to an old K list that I was on to spread the word then I would have never heard of actualism. This proves to me that getting the word out is a good thing.
What I’ve found in myself is that there’s a big energetic difference between proselytizing, where I have a stake in whether they ‘buy-in’ to my version of things, I want them to see that ‘I am right,’ I want them to be impressed by my big knowledge, my big discovery, vs. very simply telling someone something that I happen to know about and that may benefit them.
Many times I’ve fallen into proselytizing just because it is the most natural thing for an identity to do, but it does tend to immediately turn people off and ‘best-case-scenario’ I’m inflating my own ego by thinking I’m so cool for knowing about this or that. Very very gradually I’ve learned the differences and of course if I do know something that can benefit someone else, there’s no particular reason to avoid telling them! Who knows, maybe it will connect for them.
" Thatz Wattm talking about". If we want to be effective in spreading Actual Freedom, we need to be upfront with it’s goal ( EATMOBA) for it’s attraction, and stress the fact that this method is the only Treasure ( Richard’s words ) worth dedicating your life to ( because it will bring you ( and those around you ) Happiness and Delight ( like you have never ever imagined or even heard about.
But, But right away, we should stress and mention and be upfront with all the “real live” examples of why, the Method is at first might be hard to grasp and apply. And how to overcome these obstacles ( i.e. by coming to this forum and posting and getting help) . The AFT site and other material, makes it sound easy; but we know it’s not, And that is what we need to be working on in conveying to the new comers, so when and if, we catch a potential candidate, we don’t lose them to confusion, dissatisfaction and hopelessness.
I am a good example of that, I came across the AFT site( as per my Diary ) 21/2 years ago, and many times I was confused, frustrated and even more depressed and anxious. Luckily for me, for lack of hedonic distractions, I kept searching and searching ( on the Site and Slack) .
Introduction to AF method should be simplified, that’s is what I have tried to indicate in my Diary ( and I think most of your guys can relate to it, but for you it’s been “too far” in the past, to realizing that this is the real “stinker”!
I would definitely include something like this:
1= Do you want to be Happy All The Time [ for the rest of your like ]? By the way, this is the only Treasure worth looking for in this Only Life that we are given ), Without this Treasure, we all are only trying to “emotionally get by”, with various levels of success ( but mostly doing miserably, not because of fault of our own, but for what will be clear to you after knowing and applying this method, as to the cause of these miseries, but more importantly the cure for it, i.e. the Treasure)!
2=Treasure, as one would think, implies that is hard to get. However, this is both true and false. How so you might ask!
It is hard,
A.) Because you have to Dedicate Yourself ( called Sincere Intent - to be Happy and Harmless=HH ),as frequently as you can remember to do so( and initially you will forget a lot, but you will get back into being HH more and more often( and that will be rewarding and will propel your progress in the method more and more) , if you want to get this Most Worthy Prize!
It is Hard
B.) Because most of us are used to reading “how to” books and articles and we think if we can learn and gain enough knowledge, we can master the subject, as in all subjects, even psychological and spiritual . No, not for this method, studying is not enough, you have to have Dedication, not to only study it, but more importantly, to Apply the Method = HH over and over again, until it becomes a new and ingrained habit ( replacing the old, usual human state and habit of M&M = Misery & Malice or Sadness & Anger ).
It is Hard
C.)Because, assuming your interest is peeked, and you wanna know more about this Treasure, but the Method tells you, not only you have to aim to be Happy ( or at least Feel Good ), but to do it repeatedly and continuously [ and if you are not happy, you will have instruction as what to do, to become happy again] . But you are not used to being happy,( and you may not even know how to be happy, like I was) that’s why you are interested in this Treasure. Most of the people who have started and are successful in this Method, have been at it for a few years, and initially faced these “Hardship” as to how figure out and how to apply this method.
It took me many agonizing and confusing months to just understand how to “get to feel good”- don’t worry we have a forum to help you avoid this confusion and frustration.
We can help you, to get the answers, as to how, find the first few clews of “getting started” on this path-- and once you get started ( after passing the initial difficulties ) you will be able to apply the Method more and more easily, with more enjoyment, and you will progress with exponential and remarkable speed ( not to mention, that all the while, you are experiencing more joy and delight in all activities of daily life, regardless of your circumstances ) . And this is were it gets Easy and more fun.
Believe me, this method is not only Revolutionary but also Evolutionary in bringing Actual Freedom and Happiness to Humans. By the way, there is no prerequisite, for learning or trying and succeeding in this method. This Method was discovered ( by trial and error, over 26+ years) by an incredible individual named Richard, which I was delighted just to read his background and his dedication and altruism, to not only create the Method, which has proven results for him and several others, but “selflessly”, share it with the world ( almost 23 years ago), so others could also find the Treasure.
These are some of the Main Ideas, that I think should be included in an introduction/invitation to AF. Feel free to rearrange or rephrase these ideas, as I do not think, that is all easy reading!
Another idea, is to write a book, or a Ted Talk, with endorsed or engagement by a prominent social figure, e.g. Oprah W, or Tony Robins etc. etc. , so masses could be exposed to the idea, then we have a chance of catching a few more of those interested fishes!
I’ve used google ads before and am amazed how many clicks it generates so quickly. And on the other occasion I know they were real cause we had users start to take actions on the site.
It can be a very clear and direct form of communication, that leaves no room for doubt.
, but I get similar responses from most people I meet who might be interested to begin with, as soon as it clicks that they will need to actually question and change what they hold most dear any genuine interest stops.
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