Ah okay, maybe you meant “not hedonistic”?
“Hedonistic” in a colloquial usage now means… well the Claude AI put it well:
It’s funny cause that’s not at all what the original Greeks who were pursuing hedonism meant by it, but anyway the point is how we’re using the words.
So then we could coin a word “anhedonistic” to mean “not hedonistic” in the above sense.
In that case it makes a lot of sense and certainly more sincere and naive ways of affectively enjoying being alive, would not be hedonistic. So you could be saying you’re discovering how to enjoy being alive more sincerely / naively in actualist lingo, and experiencing pleasure not in this hedonistic way but in a more salubrious way.
Could indeed be great if so, I leave it for you to find out 
I understand if you don’t wanna detail out the vocabulary at this point but it is something I enjoy and maybe helpful to others
Cheers
Claudiu