Still applying getting back to feeling good - at the moment it’s basically all I’m doing. Either I feel good, or I don’t.
I realise I have been tempted again and again and again into anxiety, despair, self castigation - none of which is what the actualism method is about.
A bit of therapy and looking at my childhood etc has actually helped. Nothing excessive but just to realise that I’ve spent most of my life feeling extremely self-conscious - as if always looking at myself from an external point of view (the view of others - how they see me, what I need to be/achieve in order to be acceptable to others).
These days my life is coming back into bloom so to speak. I am no longer living that intense, lone wolf lifestyle which is clearly not conducive to feeling good.
I think something can happen as an actualist where, because feeling good seems like the hard part, you focus on dismantling social identity. This can turn into a lot…avoidance, turning away from others, isolation etc which starts to look and feel more like depression (with a lot of negative-self rumination)
Clear signs of feeling good for me include things like feeling good in my body (not like I’m taking up space), being confident and at ease, finding it easy to relate to others and care for them, a sense of fun and being on holiday.
The more I feel that the easier it is to make a habit of it.
It’s taken a long time to learn that but I’m getting it! That life was meant to be fun 