Hi Vineeto,
I’ve managed to answer my own question and actually get a satisfying answer to the thought-out part too.
What I see now is that what I “deeply and passionately care about to the point of ‘near-actual-caring’” is everybody on this planet being able to experience that astounding perfection and purity of the infinitude of actuality.
In other words what I find worthy to sacrifice myself for, is for enabling that to happen (that “experience of apperceptive direct seeing” of “the very actuality of infinitude”, as you put it) – for everybody, for every human being, every flesh and blood body to be able to experience it.
It would be the end of all the malice and sorrow, the aggression and fear, the sadness and madness, and nothing of value lost whatsoever as nurture and desire are simply redundant and unnecessary without the rest.
This makes thought-out sense on top of it being a deep and passionate caring, because it makes logical sense how my sacrifice will enable it to happen. I don’t think this is actually strictly necessary for it to make sense in like a logical thought-out way, but it is nice that it does haha.
But yes I see the way it will happen, is via caring as much as I possibly can about this, to the point of not only actually wanting to do something about it, but actually doing something about it!
In other words it is this caring is the key… and now I know for sure what I can put all my energy behind :))))
Cheers,
Claudiu