Claudiu: Oh there was one part of it that was very strange. Not sure what to make of it. While climbing up a rock wall I experienced it as two “me” being active at the same time. There was the actual me that was climbing up the wall and having a blast and being aware of being the actual me. And then there was this sort of seemingly-faux inchoate identity-me which was wondering about whether it was actual freedom and what happened.
It was like two “I” were simultaneously active at the same time. It was a bit jarring and rather strange. But also the experience could smoothly adjust to being one I or the other, depending on what “I” (but which I??) would focus on or go towards.
I thought at the time maybe it was how being newly free is experienced and this was the guardian or something, remnants of identity like this. Now I’m not sure what it was, I wasn’t actually free so it definitely wasn’t that. But it wasn’t a PCE because the feeling-being me was apparently there… but I don’t think I was mistaken about the experience of the actual me being apperceptively aware of myself. But I’m not sure how that can be since it wasn’t a PCE.
It is very strange and not sure what to make of it, but thought I’d report it and see if Vineeto has any feedback
Either way now that things have normalized the path forward is clear again !
Hi Claudiu,
This is fascinating. You can clearly see that “it wasn’t a PCE”. In a PCE ‘I’ am in abeyance, in remission, in suspension, absent, not there at all. Hence you reporting there were “Two “me” being active at the same time” cannot be true (because actuality is only experienced in a definite PCE) but most likely rather a clever life-like mirage of your tenuous yet still cunning ‘me’ in order to divert your attention.
Ha, it is an indication that the diversion tactics are getting more and more desperate, sailing so close to the wind! 
See, as a result you went on a short exploration that “maybe it was how being newly free is experienced and this was the guardian or something”, wrote a message on the forum and reported that “things have normalized”, and hence forgot about the very informative “deep pang of like “Ahh I just want to have done it already and gotten it over with!!”
For information, at the moment of becoming actually free, the full actual freedom is experienced without any restrictions. Several people have reported this and it is my own experience as well. The shadowy remnants of the social identity only start to conglomerate some time afterwards, eventually forming themselves into a more-or-less solid social identity (aka guardian), usually due to interactions with feeling beings.
And yet this diversional contemplation plus your “deep pang” are indicators that ‘me’ is not yet ready to willingly and gladly abdicate the throne – ‘I’ only admit that “I just want to have done it already and gotten it over with!!” That is still short of “all of ‘me’ on board” as I called it. It is not yet sufficient motivation for decisive and irreversible action.
Maybe my previous post will help.
Cheers Vineeto