Reading all these quotes it’s fascinating that I can relate to all that is being described experientially like never before, which means I am on the launchpad, just need to press the button for take off. However as per the quote that @Vineeto sent :
Richard: Of course, the situation and circumstances (cutting down long grass in an abandoned cow-paddock preparatory to planting trees) were peculiar to me and my context at that time and had I been some other person in some other context I could very well have been washing the dishes, for example, or riding a bicycle.
And had I been some other person in some other context the salutary realisation would have been different too … meaning that only the particular person can know what they must do – and they will not know what that is until it happens – and when they do know what to do it will be too late to stop the happening.
Hence all the procrastination – it means the end of ‘me’ – because it can, and will, happen just here right now. (Richard, AF List, No. 94a, 30 Dec 2005)
The funny thing is that this - “they will not know what that is until it happens – and when they do know what to do it will be too late to stop the happening” is exactly what happened in the dreams! 
Lately the way I am seeing the human condition is like I as this body have been here all along and ‘I’ only imagined/believed that ‘I’ existed. Which is very bizarre because ‘I’ must self immolate and at times ‘I’ can feel like ‘I’ weigh a tonne, and yet those other times ‘my’ existential status is so very flimsy that really it never had any substance to being with.
So looking from one side it is so very difficult for ‘me’ and then from the other side it’s like it’s all over nothing. Also from one side ‘I’ am giving up everything and from the other side there is nothing there of substance to give up other than an illusion, which by it’s very definition has no substance!
I didn’t reply to this, not because I disregard the message, rather it seems the only way I can reply with integrity and appreciation is by action, and there is only 1 action left now! 
It’s becoming quite a fascinating/exhilarating thing to look for, this button that exists within ‘me’. And to know that once found ‘I’ will have already pressed it. I am certain this button exists, just waiting to be pressed.