Had a wonderful “self-immolation session” just now – seem to be getting closer & closer!
The most crucial part was when I was contemplating on the fact that whatever ‘I’ could do for the world, e.g. if I dedicate my life to philanthropy, or doing good works, or doing this company or that thing – nothing would be as me doing the most I could as self-immolating. There would always be an aspect of it where I am not giving it my all, where it ends up being self-centered for ‘me’, rather than actually for the benefit of the world / of humanity etc. But the most I can do, the very best I can do, is to self-immolate!
This came with an intriguing experience where it is like I found a button or some hook – the button was seeing that ‘me’ giving ‘my’ all and actually disappearing is what is best. And I was riding that hook, somehow, and going ‘into’ it in a way. This was all accompanied by an increasingly sweet and potent purity. But then the experience ended without me having gone all the way. Was very interesting tho, not 100% sure it is how it will happen for me but I will keep going for it!!
The other thing I resolved delightfully is I started to feel an objection like that I want to know what it’s like before I do it, and somehow feeling it’s unfair that I can’t. And then I saw it was silly, because it’s just a fact that I won’t know what it’s like until it happens. The delightful analogy that came up is that it’s like having sex for the first time, you can read all about it and try to simulate it but you don’t know what it’s actually like until it happens! And if you wait until knowing what it’s like before you do it you’ll just always remain a virgin haha. So better to just go for it even if you don’t exactly know what you’re doing at first 
Ok those were the highlights, that’s all for now !