Actualism flow diagram

Ok! I took my crack at it – what does everyone think ??

actualistm-v2-quotesbottom.drawio

If the reception is good then I can tidy it up, optimize the space etc…

A few things I like about it:

  • ‘neutral’ is an answer to haietmoba as well
  • the trigger comes from enjoy&appreciate as a whole instead of just feeling good
  • after the trigger it goes back into haietmoba as you can be feeling neutral after trigger, not just feeling bad… so you first figure out where you landed. i initially did this just to optimize the lines on flowchart but i think it makes sense technique-wise too
  • the enjoy&appreciate → trigger → nip in bud → enjoy and appreciate loop is very small
  • it has you getting back to neutral before trying to identify & see silliness of the trigger
  • there are many lines going back to feeling neutral/feeling bad while trying to id trigger or see the silliness… or even focus getting back to neutral… which matches my experience quite well when in the grip of these things
  • i like the quote of “no one forces you to be happy” and if you want to really abandon actualism you can …

EDIT: Some downsides:

  • there’s no “set it aside” from the neutral… like the ‘distract yourself to get back to feeling good’, if one is feeling neutral that might be a simpler way to get back to feeling good, than seeing the silliness…

I think the tricky part is that ‘seeing the silliness’ is different than ‘investigating the issue’. “Seeing the silliness” is just seeing that it’s silly to let that specific trigger take away from feeling good. Like “my partner said X and this triggered Y insecurity…” ok. Is it silly or sensible to let your partner saying X take away from feeling good? It’s just somebody saying this or that. You can see that it’s silly… but to untangle the Y insecurity can be a much deeper investigation and that would be something to do only after getting back to feeling good.

About the “universe does not force anyone to be happy” quote, it may come off as ‘mean’ or belittling - like if you’re overwhelmed then you’re doing something wrong. But my intention is more to convey that there’s no requirement to feel good, to take away that moral element of it…

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