I am finding THC to be an excellent refocuser. I never liked weed because it just made me sad. But nowadays it makes me trip where only some of that includes sadness. I really like it because psyche likes slow down so that i can really see it in action. or maybe it just gets so extreme that i can discern it from an ongoing narrative better and hone in on it. Or maybe my ongoing narrative just gets quieter. At any rate, I gain a lot of insights while on a gummy and it helps remind me to pursue self immolation.
I never liked it either. Had it maybe 8 times, never good.
I am a mushroom evangelical these days.
Nothing had focused me like this has. Even now, completely sober, I can’t unsee that I am not only a feeling, but a redundant one.
What I found with weed is I would have the experience of having a lot of profound insights and seeing things I couldn’t before. But then I could never remember them.
So I tried writing them down as I had them so I could read it later and remember. And … it always turned out to be garbage haha. Like nothing actually insightful.
I concluded that part of the mind altering effect was making me feel like I was having insights when I wasn’t haha.
Not saying it’s the case here but just something to look out for …
Classic stoner trope. Lol. For me, I am dealing with sadness and self-recrimination during my trips. And I’m hyper alert both inwardly and externally. So I get to see the negative feeling the moment it pops up and I get to see myself try to reject it outright or validate it. I also get to see myself, on occasion - my trips are really long so plenty of opportunities - go with it to see what’s up. This immediate pressure to deal with a negative emotion that has the possibility of derailing my whole trip leads to peak experiences and great observations of they psyche.