“What one does is that one dedicates oneself to the challenge of being just here, right now, as the universe’s experience of itself.”
Vineeto: Freedom is to be free of authority, free of one’s ‘self’, free of any psychic, mental and emotional construct, free of churning emotions and the sorrow of compassion. Freedom is to be free to be the universe experiencing itself as a sensate and reflective human being.
Sometimes I found that I had to do something physical such as go for a walk or work in the garden in order to break free of being consumed by a particular intensive feeling.
Now, as to the current feeling of regularity/ the majority experience of being a regular person, all you need to do is acknowledge what you have already said … to wit: the feeling of regularity does have irregularities to it (albeit the really obvious ones of fear, aggression, nurture and desire).
By virtue of the fact you now have the beginnings of at least some degree of influence, over how you feel each moment again, your own interest in how you experience yourself can start to quicken (there being nothing which succeeds like success) and the more your own interest is piqued the more your awareness will increase of its own accord; eventually you can become almost eager to see what else will show up under the bright light of awareness.
RESPONDENT: Richard, how long do you think will it take before it becomes automatic to have the question running?
RICHARD: About as long as it takes to realise that feeling anything other than happy and harmless sucks … and sucks big-time at that.
RICHARD: By being here, right now, as this flesh and blood body. A feeling is not a fact; it is an identity’s interpretation of the actual and to be standing back and expressing a feeling – to feel an emotion or be passionate about life – is nowhere near the same as being here now as an actuality. In actually being just here – right now – one is completely involved, utterly concerned; being here now is total inclusion. One demonstrates one’s appreciation of life by partaking fully in existence … by letting this moment live one (rather than ‘living in the present’) so that one is the doing of what is happening. One dedicates oneself to the challenge of being here now as the universe’s experience of itself.
Initially one is deathly afraid to actually be here now, as it can feel rather rudely raw … one feels more naked and exposed than taking off one’s clothing in the market place. However, feeling rudely raw about the prospect of being here now is not the same as actually being here now … feelings are notoriously unreliable for ascertaining a fact. Being here now is to be at the place in infinite space and eternal time where all is pristine. This pristine place is this, the actual world … and it is already always here. This actual world is original; unmarred, uncorrupted, unspoiled, spotless, fresh and perpetually new. It is alarming to feel this immaculateness – it is frightening in its immediate intimacy – which is why one backs off, initially denying its very existence. What happens though, if one takes the risk to actually be here now – instead of standing back and feeling it out in order to make up one’s mind – is that one discovers that oneself is also pristine.
Then one is actually benevolent (harmless), actually concerned (happy) for all peoples … no one is special. There is a vast gulf betwixt feeling benevolent (with feelings such as pity, sympathy, empathy, compassion and so on) and actually being benevolent (free of malice). Similarly, the concern one feels for others (worry, distress, anxiety, grief, anguish, torment and all the rest) is far removed from the actual interest one has in one’s fellow human being’s welfare (free of sorrow).
That’s a great quote, reading it I am getting flashes of memories and a flavour of that immediate intimacy and immaculateness, I can’t pinpoint when these happened but they did, I was actually in that place so it is possible to find it again over and over.
“‘Do your own thing … but have fun; if you’re not having fun then, hell, stop doing it, something is wrong; if you’re not having fun, if you have to force yourself to go to work, if you’re unhappy, something is wrong’”
“it is not a case of being ready for it as being ready only occurs when you have it occur”
[Respondent No. 6] I am beginning to understand pulling back/ turning away: it is like crossing a rubicon, an experience of it can be physically felt as an empty space/ throbbing right under the belly (the uterus contracting).
• [Richard]: A deep feeling of dread, the abject intuition of impending doom, is fraught with foreboding, be it a grim, dire, or awful presage, and this intensely apprehensive trepidation is symptomatic of the existential angst (the anguish of the essential insecurity of being a contingent ‘being’) which underpins all suffering.
As such an occasion of profound dread is an opportune moment to plumb the depths of ‘being’ itself (‘me’ at the core of ‘my’ being) rather than avoidance through realisation of the portentous event as all manner of phantasmagoria can be manifested by such evasion.
With pure intent one can enable a movement into the existential angst, rather than despairingly grasping at doomsday straws, which movement facilitates the bright light of awareness being shone into the innermost recesses of ‘my’ presence … which is ‘presence’ itself.
Such an active perspicacity in ‘my’ moment of reckoning will reveal that ‘presence’ itself feeds off ‘my’ fear – it is its very life-blood as it were – and this functional acuity brings an abrupt end to its nourishment.
Whereupon all-of-a-sudden one finds oneself on the other side of the wall (to keep with the ‘cornered’ analogy for now) with the hitherto unseeable doorway to freedom closing behind one and one is walking freely in this actual world where one has already always been living anyway.
All what happened was that upon ‘my’ exposure dissolution occurred and the Land of Lament sank without a trace.
Currently investigating this
That’s one heck of a nuke of a quote, @henryyyyyyyyyy. It seems like it’s very easy to sort of slip sideways instead. Existential dread is like doing a physical boxing match.
Ha yes, it’s quite blood & guts! That’s the part where it requires some courage to ‘go there,’ but with some perspicacity (Richard’s word from above), there’s a ton of information lurking there
And really it’s where the rubber meets the road in actualism
“The truth is you’re going to die. The fact is you’re alive.” - Milito Paz
“Looking between the stars instead of looking at the stars and realizing infinity”
-Paraphrasing Richard (from selected correspondence on infinitude)
I came across this quote from Richard regarding investigation. He doesn’t seem to talk about it much (at least not that I’ve found on the AFT), so I found it interesting to get this insight from his perspective:
R: Are you saying that emotions are unhealthy for the body?
Q: Yes, it’s good to have as little of them as possible … rather none at all. This does not mean that therefore one should repress them. When an emotion is there, take it in hand … put it in the middle of the table, as it were, and walk around it, have a good look at it and feel every aspect of it. Become aware of it and ask: ‘What is so good about this emotion’?
R: Some people would say to let go of it …
Q: No, no, no. I don’t ‘let go of it’. By looking at it, it goes. This looking and feeling is looking and feeling with total awareness … all of me is aware of what this emotion is doing to me as this body. Where, in the body, do I feel it the most? Does it really feel good? Is it one hundred per cent good? No, it is not … there is always a ‘Yes, but …’ Even the good emotions can never live up to what they promise. By looking at them they disappear; you see how unnecessary they are. That is with hindsight of course, for you cannot see that they are unnecessary – that there is ‘life after emotions’ – when you are in the grip of the emotion.
This is getting to the ‘nitty-gritty’ of me. It is so fascinating … all these emotions have always kept myself in existence. The good emotions are also me. This is my self.
“You need to have a keen sense of humour. This business of becoming free is not – contrary to popular opinion – a serious business at all. Be totally sincere … most definitely utterly sincere, as genuineness is essential. But serious … no way. Humour is essential – it is inevitable in an actual freedom – and one has a lot of fun along the way. An actual freedom is all about having fun; about enjoying being here; about delighting in being alive. All that ‘being serious’ stuff actively works against peace-on-earth. One has to want to be here on this planet … most people resent being here and wish to escape. This method will bring one into being more fully here than anyone has ever been before. If you do not want to be here, then forget it.” Ricardo El Canguro Libre
¿¿Ricardo El Canguro Libre??
Bueno es un australiano el Richard, no? Jajaja okay I am lame
Uh… muy bueno… Ni siquiera capté a quién aludía “Ricardo”…
¡Demasiados años de leer en inglés!