So I thought I’d finally get around to writing about my 2 day trip to Ballina a few months ago with Craig and Felix.
My primary aim was to find out more about the ‘guardian’ and the transition from basic to full freedom. I also just wanted to catch up with Richard and Vineeto and see what meeting them as an actually free person would be like.
Felix picked me up at the airport and we drove in together the next day. Craig was already in the boat house taking to Richard and Vineeto. Haha I remember how we misfired by getting way too much junk food - chips and lollies - the first day. Richard liked the deli meat and fresh fruit spread better on day 2. As did I!
We discussed a lot of topics, not all of which I’m going to list here. But here are the highlights that stood out for me …
The thing that was the most striking, surprising and memorable was the energy around Richard and Vineeto, which I perceived as different in an optical way. It was like you get in a mirage where the air seems to bend and shimmer light around it - except far subtler. Craig remarked that my face looked completely different, much more relaxed after AF. And Felix could also perceive something different in our manner and energy vs. himself - and other people. So the most impactful memory wasn’t something content based at all really. I asked Vineeto about the energy around them and she said it was infinitude.
The other thing Richard said was that no one on the forum seemed to be practicing the actualism method! He was urging Felix to be one of the first ones to do so and therefore set an example. But he also said he was satisfied with the success of actual freedom.
I might just cut/paste the other stuff from the notes I made that might be of interest. If it doesn’t make sense I’m happy to clarify:
Vineeto - (for full AF) You need to find something that makes you go, that drives you. That is important. Both Peter and Grace, felt that they are happy with what they had. I wasn’t happy. I knew I wanted the full freedom, to be there with Richard where he was. Knew this by talking to him about his experience but also the experience of sitting with him.
You know you reach full freedom when you get there and you know there is nothing more that needs to be done.
‘Many more things’ to become fully AF post guardian abdication that she wrote about - including contemplation of infinite time and infinite space - anywhere/anywhen and nowhere/nowhen - she lost her bearings.
(Abdication) …was like talking to a different person, negotiating with her, finally guardian left - like walked away to the other side of the moat leaving her behind.
Richard - jade goddess vision when he was newly free. Was mixing up bits of enlightenment with his newly free experience. Different appraisal now after many years of hindsight.
Better at comforting people as I am no longer in the way now - Richard. Agreed with Craig’s experience of this.
Peter first came up with the idea of shadow identity which Vineeto called guardian - something left.
Richard enjoys and is moved by watching stories of human triumph on TV and Vineeto is moved by e.g. Americas Got Talent and The Voice!
Richard’s enlightenment experience purged him of much social identity - somehow through ego death. But some unknowns and disparity of opinion about to what extent social identity is a bit about ego. Ego related to social identity perhaps? Vineeto suggested that there may be mental aspects of ego that were related to social identity and still present when one is newly free.
Limitations of NF freedom well recognised by Vineeto.
All those beliefs, values, egoish stuff, knits itself into a coherent identity. (Memories of feeling too I think)
Richard was scared to give up being a smart aleck identity, sarcasm as he got by with his wits not his fists.
You can’t be got at psychically! In fully AF
You are completely anonymous in fully AF
Becoming more feminine - Richard noticed this in himself. Craig had it too - children more comforted by him than his wife.
Newly free Vineeto noted that even after abdication she was not in Richard’s place (experientially and by questioning)
In order to become NF be prepared to give up everything, then realising it comes back at a different level (reminds me of Geoffrey’s report - which was also my experience in becoming AF)
Became interested in politics only after actual freedom - examining beliefs about what was imported into the actual world - didn’t want the community of actually free people to be burdened by these wrong ideas.