Thank you for those quotes, they describe perfectly what I was getting at. The last quote (below) also touches on something I wanted to write about - the enormity/totality of ‘my’ extinction. Specifically in this quote it is clear that the correspondent can’t quite grasp that there is no ‘entity’ of any description inside the flesh and blood body called Richard to “CREATE thoughts” or “have free will” etc :
So I have been drawn lately to contemplate the enormity/totality of ‘my’ extinction, I have been getting glimpses of what it entails. That not only am ‘I’ erased in ‘my’ totality but it is also the end of the species known as ‘humanity’ - it is the end of all of that. So the totality/finality of ‘my’ extinction is indeed enormous, not a shred of ‘me’ to be found anywhere in the universe.
And whenever ‘I’ get a glimpse of this, it is exactly what ‘I’ want, it pulls ‘me’ forward, it is the most perfect destiny - for exactly that to happen.