Hi Vineeto,
Thanks for your reply, it’s valuable to be reminded that intimacy can be experienced at any time with another human being. 
I am feeling better today.
I’m terms of the mix of complicated feelings to do with the cervical biopsy, it wasn’t the possibility of the results that was worrying me and bringing up bad feelings. Interestingly, that was what Kuba assumed as well. I’m actually not so worried about the results at all really, it was more the overwhelming feeling of being violated during the colposcopy that has sent my head spinning. My heart dropped when I walked into the room and realised a male doctor would be carrying out my procedure (not that it should really matter). Although logically I know everyone was there to look out for my health and wellbeing and it is in fact a wonderful thing that this care exists. I felt scared and violated through out the whole thing and on the verge of tears, when he stated he needed to take two biopsies the floodgates open and I was in ultimate panic mode. I was scared of the pain and the thought of the thought of the punch cervical biopsy forceps taking chunks of my cervix was very raw and I felt viscerally. My instinctual reaction was that a man was hurting me in my most intimate inner protected part.
When it actually happened the pain wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be and overall it was a very uncomfortable and painful experience. I know it wouldn’t have been so bad if I didn’t feel the way I did. I had a conversation with Kuba afterwards and the more I talk about it the more It’s becoming clear that a situation that is actually quite a wonderful thing to be able to have access to, was muddled up by intense instinctual feelings and I’m feeling less and less bad about it as the days go by but there’s definitely still moments of feeling violated which pop up time to time.