What a weird combo today… I have come down with some sorta chest infection situation going on so I woke up this morning with my lungs on fire, nose blocked etc
The funny thing is that I am feeling great! It doesn’t seem right to be enjoying myself this much whilst sick, like this should not be allowed 
The way I usually feel when ill is a general sense of low energy, tired etc but that is not there at all today, it’s like the symptoms are there but affectively I really feel great, and so the symptoms are no biggie…
This kinda puts a spoiler on that ‘bleak future’ I was writing about yesterday lol - Chrono's Journal - #24 by Kub933
It seems though this feeling great is largely to do with slowly backing out of that affective mush called ‘humanity’. What I was writing about ‘not caring’ has been continuing to play itself out and there is a progressive freedom from things like obligation and responsibility (whilst remaining harmless)
It’s especially quite fun at work as I work in customer service. It is not that I am out there looking to ‘stick it to them’ but at the same time I no longer play the ‘subservient role’, there is less and less of power structure of ‘customer vs servant’. When I talk to customers now there is a certain directness that allows me to skip past playing the games, its so freeing to no longer have to play the games! What I noticed is that sometimes I can even call people out on their BS, and sometimes it is sensible to do so, it is just that it does not align with my ‘role’ as the ‘servant’. What a delicate balance to walk but it is possible. To be direct and effective whilst not being rude, aggressive, uncaring. I am walking right on that line more and more though which is really fun.
It is like I don’t have to diminish myself in order to assist others, and I do not need to tower over them either out of fear, that whole game can disappear, exciting stuff!