What has come to my attention recently is this habit of ‘mine’ where ‘I’ seek to lay out what is ahead, essentially planning out and scheming how things will happen. And not just concerning self-immolation but even day to day living. It seems lately this habit is being chipped away at, and not even by ‘me’ as much as by the facts of life 
It dawned on me this morning that ‘I’ have woken up thousands of times and planned “how the day is going to go” and not a single time it happened as per the plan/scheme, and yet ‘I’ wake up once again and do the same thing… lol. It is becoming more and more obvious that it is simply impossible for ‘me’ to create a plan/scheme and to have life fit into it. In fact by the time ‘I’ say ‘my’ plan out loud things have already changed enough that it no longer applies, so it is now progressively being seen as completely useless to do this at all, what for?
If I was to use a metaphor of life being a movie that is being played and ‘my’ plans/schemes being a stencil which ‘I’ am holding over this moving image and expecting it to fit, it just cannot work.
Planning and scheming is becoming a bit of a pain in the backside at this point, I’d rather just do without it all together. I remember a funny incident where me and Sonya were driving to the shops and trying to decide what we are going to have for dinner, we couldn’t decide so I said - “I’m gonna let the universe decide”. Funnily enough we got to the supermarket and the entire section which houses the meat was being cleaned or what have you and as such not a single one of our plans could happen anyways. So all this deliberation we were going through in the car it was for nothing in the end.
So what I am contemplating is whether all of ‘my’ planning and scheming can be safely dispensed with.
A similar question was asked as part of the Australia Q and A’s :
How does planning differ in Actual Freedom? How do they approach unknowns in planning?
Do they make plans? If they do, does it differ significantly from the way they dealt with making plans pre-actualisation? Or is it as simple as feeling felicitous/innocuous throughout the process from start to finish? Part of why I’m asking is that I’ve found some of Richard’s descriptions of time interesting – e.g.: only now is happening – and I’m curious how that might affect thinking about the future.
Richard (Vineeto was not here today) doesn’t think about the future, as that doesn’t exist in the actual world. Only this moment exists, which is eternal, but not static … It is dynamic. It is events that change/move (not time).
Yet, plans are made in the same way as they were before, if something is needed (for example groceries), he knows he would need to get to the store while it’s open, and get the things he needs. If he has an appointment, he knows when he needs to be there. Every day when we’re about to leave we “plan” to get together the next day.
But this doesn’t quite answer my question, which is - is it possible for ‘me’ to do away with all ‘my’ scheming and planning and still live sensibly. Of course if Richard needed to go to the shop which closes at 8pm and the drive is 15min then he would understand that he needs to leave before 7:45 and would act accordingly. But is this kind of “planning” the same activity as what ‘I’ am doing when ‘I’ wake up and create a stencil of the day ahead which ‘I’ am then seeking to live out? 