I will just add the below which came to mind a few minutes ago. This is how ‘Vineeto’ experienced ‘her’ last moments :
When I returned to the living room a dynamic and quite frivolous interaction developed and in that uninhibited hilarious atmosphere I blew the last remaining cobwebs of seriousness, cautiousness and social correctness out of the corners of my psyche. It was all very casual, jovial and funny, unrehearsed and spontaneous and I became confident that this is how I wanted to live my life forever.
This is in the other direction to what ‘I’ was doing before, ‘I’ was holding onto and nourishing the seriousness, trying to self-immolate from the seriousness. Of course this can never work, I see this energy of seriousness for what it is now, it will never deliver the goods, it can be discarded now.
I wrote the below a while ago :
Oh wow yes savouring indeed, I can hardly contain myself haha. I was driving from the shops with Sonya yesterday and I had a smile glued permanently to my face
. To see that in actual freedom there is only enjoyment and appreciation, the method makes perfect sense all of a sudden!
So there is no seriousness in actual freedom, how could seriousness ever assist with becoming actually free. In fact it does the precise opposite, it anchors ‘me’ as a ‘being’.