Yes I am starting to see the pattern, it’s a bit like when someone clearly goes down hill for whatever reason and often (whilst it is clear to those around them) they are unaware themselves, until the penny drops. Like Richard wrote just who am ‘I’ kidding anyways, it seems kidding ‘myself’ is usually the answer, whilst it is already out in the open for everyone around.
Well I am referring the general flavour you pick up from the thousands of posts I have written on here 
Oh I will just add @Vineeto when I wrote the other posts there was some fear/anxiety as to how you would respond - So yes clearly ‘I’ had something to hide, ‘I’ was afraid of ‘my’ hiding place being exposed.