this struck a cord with me. but namely because the consciousness experiences i’ve had that mostly closely align with the state you and richard describe - where the psychological self/center is completely gone, there are only senses and a direct awareness of infinity - were actually pretty overwhelming. a lot of agitation/remnants of fear were still present and were experienced very acutely without the buffer of the psychological self, kind of reminiscent of the adjustment period richard described, and i definitely felt disoriented too. it makes those experiences feel like a little less of a compass for me because they actually didn’t feel super desirable. did you have an adjustment period too, once you arrived at full freedom? is this overwhelm/transitional agitation just part of the experience?
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