Hi @FrankN, thanks for your questions as I hadn’t written here for quite a while. This may be a good spot to jot down a little bit of my history. I’ve actually been “practicing” actualism since 2010. I put practicing in quotes as I hadn’t really been consistently enjoying and appreciating this moment of being alive. I had also taken very long breaks away due to issues in my life that were very overwhelming. But back then, actualism was co-opted by the affers and I was following that way of practicing it and I had to slowly discover what actualism was really about. But with that said, there was a rather big set-back that I had been struggling with since which has really hampered practicing actualism as well. I really wish I had never gotten into contact with any of the affers. Nevertheless, there’s something that I recognized in Richard’s writings since day one of reading them. This was what kept me going and made me quickly abandon spirituality.
I have had PCE’s, but I wouldn’t describe them as very long. And I have a tendency to forget the details after a certain amount of time. I suspect maybe this is peculiar to ‘me’. I only remember a certain quality about it and always have the experience of “it could happen now”. Or another way of phrasing it is “this moment is happening now” and when I become aware of this then there’s also the feeling that something is imminent. But I also think I’ve always had this sort of connection. This is what I think let me immediately recognize what Richard points to in his writings.
I suppose when I say reflection, I mean an active thinking with all your being. I’m also usually in a setting (e.g. my room or walking in nature) and neutral-good mood that’s conducive to reflecting. When I reflected on how it is always this moment there’s a fascination that went along with it. “Is it really this moment? Wow, it really is this moment. It’s always happening. Only this moment is happening now”. I was fascinated with that simple fact. This full participation of my being (fascination) allows the seeing of the fact and simultaneously also has an effect on my feeling state as well. Idk if that makes it clearer lol. Reflecting in this way also allows me to more easily rememorate-presentiate the quality of a PCE in my experience.