Ah this makes sense now, if ‘I’ am treating actual freedom as a desperate escape plan for ‘me’ then it is merely a self-centred involvement borne of ‘my’ resentment to being here, it’s selfism driving the attempt and so it is bound to go round in circles.
As Richard wrote - “Only altruism – self-sacrificial humanitarianism – will provide the enormous energy necessary for ‘self’-immolation”.
When gloomy and grumpy ‘I’ am certainly not concerned with much else other than ‘me’. I find that ongoing felicity and innocuity does naturally engage dedication to peace on earth, it broadens the scope of ‘my’ caring and it demonstrates/reminds ‘me’ just how precious the end of suffering - for all - is.