Yes thank you @Vineeto it seems you stopped me right in the tracks of a habit of mine - of hanging back in the ‘normal’ and from there trying to throw some kind of a Hail Mary towards actual freedom. It never works because the distance is too great and from that ‘normal’ place ‘I’ am not advised by the perfection and purity, instead ‘I’ resort to theories. It’s like ‘I’ am hanging out in the cage (with the doors wide open) whilst coming up with the next ‘great escape plan’ 
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It is becoming clear to me that going out-from-control is the next step, in fact I have been hanging out on the edge of this decision for a long time. Now is a great time to do it, with @claudiu having already gone ahead and done it anyways, which I am full of admiration for.
What I have been doing is setting the intent to continue allowing the perfection and purity each moment again come what may, committing to having that golden clew active at all times, with each instance of the connection being severed being treated as a flashing red light in the same way I would with a diminution into feeling bad.
It is exhilarating to commit in such a way, this is going further than I would usually allow myself to, and some more, the rewards are certainly worth the effort though.
Last night I was watching a random YouTube video which was showing the latest high resolution pictures of mars and comparing it with earth. Usually watching astronomy videos ‘I’ feel somewhat alien, alone, small, in danger etc. Essentially there is that backdrop of the existential angst of being a ‘self’.
This time it was different, I saw that there is no outside to this universe, that I as this body am not separate from it, and then looking at the pictures of the earth I was able to fully appreciate the wonder and magic of it all.
That this enormous and infinitely complex universe even exists in the first place, and further that it has arranged itself into the azure planet called earth, and further that this planet is teeming with life, and further that from all of this a thinking and reflective creature was born, and further that as this creature the universe is able to experience itself - WOW.
I realise that all of the above is this body’s and every body’s birthright, and this brings a depth to the words “fellow human being” which I can’t quite put into words.