Pretty excited this morning at something that has finally clicked. For a long time I have been stuck in this fear of no longer being able to relate to others if I give up being a group member.
There was this sense that if I continue down the wide and wondrous path that I am somehow separating myself from ‘them’, like I am leaving ‘them’ behind. Almost as if I am going deeper into separation, there was this sense that somehow this is ‘wrong’.
This morning this whole issue did a flip! And all of a sudden I saw clear as ever that ‘I’ as a group member am already forever separated from my fellow human beings. And that the only way for me to ever get truly close to them is to give up being an identity, and I could see that it is totally safe and very desirable, it’s what I have always wanted.
It’s hard to explain the irony of this seeing over text but it’s like the thing that I was most afraid of happening is actually continually caused by ‘me’ and yet I projected it onto becoming free.