Indeed and I did not get that impression. I understood you to be describing two different things: the fatal attraction itself, and the fatal attraction syndrome which is an identity’s reaction of repulsion to said fatal attraction. Am I comprehending properly?
I have come to appreciate this fatal attraction and its persistence. It took some time and some more ingredients (developing sincerity) but it has allowed me to stop pushing myself - something which if left up to me I doubt I’d be able to maintain. (As well as taint by doing things my way). That pushing would make the actualism method unenjoyable and would lead to all sorts of internal complaints akin to, “the actualism method is too hard” or “I can’t do this,” etc.
One thing I’ve never attempted to do is repress it, as I’ve always seen it as helpful. But I also consider that there may still be unexpected holdouts that could pop up and replace that enticement with alarm. Or perhaps not. I will be pleased to meet any unexpected hold outs sensibly, rather than nurture their apparent reality.
Thank you, I intend to.
It is now 2026, and I have been at this for 7 years. There has not been a single day where I didn’t think about actualism/peace on earth in that time. With an affective awareness up-and-running it segued into a moment-to-moment participation - as in, I’m not just going to think about it, I will also do something about it. Its my over-arching life goal. I am so glad to have had the website as I could not have done this on my own, and there is still more to come!